Never Ending Depression - Depression Support - The Depression - Story - Medicals

Hi, I am a 41 male. Married, with 2 teenage childrenChild neglect and psychological abuse
Child safety seats
School age child development. I'm in what most would consider a "masculine" career. I've been battling depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children for as long as I can remember....sometimes just minor....sometimes to the point I cannot function as a "normal" person. I've considered suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior a few times. I was not willing to seek help due to my career and the perceptions. However, I did go see a psychiatrist 2 months ago and started on anti-depressants and therapy. The anti-depressants have worked to a certain extent, however, it feels like they are only masking my depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children. The therapy has been less than helpful. Basically, the therapist doesnt is incompetent in my opinion. I have tried to just push this aside, but the last few days I have felt a deep depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children coming on, one stronger than I ever experienced. I do not like being unhappy and cannot understand why I cant just beat this thing? I am seriously thinking about taking my life if I cannot break this depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children this time. The only reason I have to live is my childrenChild neglect and psychological abuse
Child safety seats
School age child development. I trully dont want to leave them a legacy of suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior. However, the painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources is more than I can take. Its not explainable. My wife does not/cannot understand how much painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources and turmoil I am in. I am trying so hard.

Lastly, I know the reason for my depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children, but cannot come to any resolution. My parents abandoned me when I was very young and to this day have never been a part of my life. I started emailing and calling them recently. However, both, for some reason unknown to me, have again decided to have nothing to do with me. The rejection, even at 41 years of age, hurts more than I can take.

I just wanted to know if anyone was out there who understands??

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hello, I just want to let you know that I am veru sorry to hear you say that, however i hope that I can give you some better options that taking your life. You are definately worth it, even if you think your not. First can you find another pshycologist, there are diffrent medicationsAllergic reactions to medication
Drug allergies
Drug-induced hypertension
Getting a prescription filled
Home pharmacy
Inhaler medication administration, also there are books you can read that know one has to know that you are reading, The worst thing to do is mask the depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children. These feelings are real and need to come out to someone that youe trust. I realize this could be hard to do. It took me 6 couselors before I found one that I thought knew what they were talking about. I also had to accept that I needed to listen to everything she asked me to do, this is very difficult for me as I am very hard headed. I would really like to help, I hope any of this info helps. You really arent alone, and ending your journey is not the answer. There truly is a reason you are here. Find someone to trust and I promise it will get better. Much luck Ill be thinking of you. keep in touch

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Funny, I feel almost exactly the way you do, which is why I stumbled across your letter here. My way of trying to see if there is anyone who actually understands how I feel as well. I also have a couple kids who admire %26 adore me %26 see the mask I wear as a happy one. They are who I live for %26 I absolutely could not ruin THEIR lives just because my own is a mess. PLEASE take that into consideration - don't abandon them because you already know the painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources THAT causes in %26 of itself. Surely you wouldn't want to wish this terrible painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources that we have insdie on the people that we love the most.

I also have gone to my doctor, poured my heartCongenital heart disease
Cor pulmonale
Coronary heart disease
Cyanotic heart disease
Depression and heart disease
Heart attack
Heart attack first aid
Heart attack symptoms
Heart bypass surgery
Heart bypass surgery - series
Heart disease out when I thought I just couldn't take it anymore. They've put me on drugsChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension, I've taken them %26 just felt even more crappy %26 lethargic at most, so I stopped. Every time they've told me to do the psychiatrist thing. When I had better finances years ago, I tried, but I just couldn't see telling a stranger things that they either could care less about or just couldn't relate to. Nowadays, I can't afford to see a psychiatrist, but even if I could I don't think seeing one would make me feel better - actually telling my **** to someone who just sees me as a payment on their mortgage or yacht makes me feel WORSE!

Nevertheless...I can absolutely relate to your feelings of HATING feeling this way. It sucks so BAD to be in this much inner turmoil - the only voice of reason that keeps the wheels turning is the life clock ticking away until the day it all ends naturally %26 until then, seeing my kids thrive. I wouldn't wish this on anyone - please take care.

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I understand completley having been there my self 3 different times Change your therapist so you can deal with the abandonment that is pulling you down.keep your childrenChild neglect and psychological abuse
Child safety seats
School age child development iforemost in your thoughts. that is what kept me me fro suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior.I just knew nobody could take better care of them than me.
Keep posting here.Know you are loved and worthy to be loved.
Love Venora

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Thank-you for your inputs. I've stopped taking my medicationsAllergic reactions to medication
Drug allergies
Drug-induced hypertension
Getting a prescription filled
Home pharmacy
Inhaler medication administration--they do no good at all. I was recently put on a stronger dose of Prozac and Seroquel which only made me feel more depressed, suicidal, and like a zombie. I have not taken anything since Tuesday and feel very irratible.

I continue to have serious thoughts of suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior. I know I should contactContact dermatitis someone, but I am hoping this will pass. Right now I think I'd be better off if things just ended. I know how crazy that sounds, but I am so numb right now.

I am putting on a good front for my wife and kids. But inside the turmoil is getting to be too much. I feel if I seek help (i had one time before) I will lose my job, my career, my dignity........etc.

I have started thinking about specific ways to end things, but havent decided it makes any sense. Maybe the worst day here is still better than the unknown which awaits.....I dont know.

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TAke yourself to the hoispital now and get some help.Think how devasted your familyBirth control and family planning
Choosing a primary care provider
Ewing’s sarcoma
Family troubles - resources will be with out you.I had to to hospital 3 times and now I take my meds faithfullt.
I pray you go get some help.DepressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children can be beaten with the right meds and therapy.Please let me know how you are and please please dont go for suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior.You have soooo much to live for.Dont let your childrenChild neglect and psychological abuse
Child safety seats
School age child development be daddyless.It will scarKeloid scar
Miscarriage
Scar revision
Scarlet fever
Signs of scarlet fever them for life.You are loved and cared for by so many people.
You are in my prayers
Love Venora

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I jusst wanted to add to talk to your wife and let her know what you are feeling Dont bear this burden alone I am sure she loves you and will want to help all she can.One of the worst things I did was to keep all my emotrions bottled up and not share them with my best friend my husband.It was so unfair to him to not let him know what I was going through.So I sure she will love andsupport you through this difficult time.
Please let me know how you are and if you wnat to talk I will listen.
Love Venora

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Hi mate, I've been there myself and know how alone and helpless it feels. The only way i delt with it was to **** the drugsChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension off and talk to my mates in a very frank and brutally honest way. it was hard. but my friends responded really well and were there for me and i suspect that you may find the same thing happen. at least try. talking openly to your close friends is so much better than talking to a therapist. keep it regular and let them know that you appreciate thier friendship and help. please, no matter how bad u feel don't leave your wife n kids alone. my best friend killed himself recently. i feel sickSick sinus syndrome not being able to talk to him. even if you only tough it out for your familiesBirth control and family planning
Choosing a primary care provider
Ewing’s sarcoma
Family troubles - resources sake for now, you will benefit later on down the road for your courage. the fact that you have raised a familyBirth control and family planning
Choosing a primary care provider
Ewing’s sarcoma
Family troubles - resources and lived with this for 40+ yrs indicates you are a strong person(even if you're not particularly feeling it now). it's an old cliche but communication is really what you need. at least as a first step. we're all rootin for you. good luck.

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Help is on the way but it wont be overnight. I too am fighting depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children but mine is due to taking Lortab for the past two years for painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources. First off...let me tell you I am not a doctor but have been through similar situations. I am 43 and have a good job and hate going to work each morning...I cant stand to see the sunActinic keratosis
Fontanelles - sunken
Liver spots
Sun protection
Sunburn
Sunburn first aid
Sunken fontanelles (superior view) come up. I have been fighting several different health issues over the past two years and have tried everything from Cymbalta, Lyrica, Neurotryptiline, Fentanyl patchesAllergy testing
Skin color - patchy, Lortab, Percocet and Darvocet.

All have had HORRIBLE side effects on me. I am not going to tell you your issues are not real because they are but what I can tell you is I think I can help. Just tonight did I have a conversation with a friend that seemed to ease my anxietyGeneralized anxiety disorder
Separation anxiety
Stress and anxiety and depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children. This person is very close to me and we also attend the same church.

At the risk of seeming like a "COOK" to most people I feel convicted to share this info with you. I would like to invite you to a web site...www.lifechruch.tv. We are currently studying the book of Johan and how he decided to do his will instead of God's. If after looking through this site and you would like to talk to me please contactContact dermatitis me at ***@**** promise I will answer your messages. I'm not saying I will have the answer to your problem but I guarantee I can get you headed in the right direction. I'VE BEEN THERE MYSELF! Doing it on your own will be difficult.
I hope this helps and hope you will visit the site. I also hope the moderators on this site wont delete this message.

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whatever you do, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not kill yourself. it's so sadDepression when people do that, because that is never the solution. especially coming from a father...imagine how your kids would feel if you killed yourself? they would be devastated and have to live with that for the rest of their life. do you really want that to happen to you? suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior would be the most selfish thing you could possibly do. you would end your painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources, but you would bring on endless painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources for your entire familyBirth control and family planning
Choosing a primary care provider
Ewing’s sarcoma
Family troubles - resources including your childrenChild neglect and psychological abuse
Child safety seats
School age child development. do you really love your childrenChild neglect and psychological abuse
Child safety seats
School age child development? because if you do, you will NOT kill yourself.

and believe me, as someone who has suffered from serious depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children for many years, i DO understand how you feel. but depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children CAN be beaten! you have to find the right psychologist, and the right medicationAllergic reactions to medication
Drug allergies
Drug-induced hypertension
Getting a prescription filled
Home pharmacy
Inhaler medication administration. i suggest going to a different psychologist...an anti-depressent called Paxil, i'm sure you've heard of it, saved my life. while on this medicine, i do not feel an ounce of depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children. i feel fulfilled, confident, well-rounded, and HAPPY. take that from someone who's depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children was probably worse than yours. it may not work for everyone, but i would highly reccomend talking to a doctor about it. and please, suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior is NOT the answer...please trust me on that one.

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"SuicideSuicide and suicidal behavior is a PERMANENT solution to a TEMPORARY problem" PLEASE listen to all these good people who have taken the time to try and touch your heartCongenital heart disease
Cor pulmonale
Coronary heart disease
Cyanotic heart disease
Depression and heart disease
Heart attack
Heart attack first aid
Heart attack symptoms
Heart bypass surgery
Heart bypass surgery - series
Heart disease. I too have suffered with chronicAcute vs. chronic conditions
Addison’s disease
Anemia of chronic disease
Cause of chronic bronchitis
Chronic bronchitis
Chronic cholecystitis
Chronic fatigue syndrome
Chronic fatigue syndrome - resources
Chronic lymphocytic leukemia (cll)
Chronic lymphocytic leukemia - microscopic view
Chronic motor tic disorder depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children most of my life, and have been on many different meds. Like many other people I have taken myself off medicationsAllergic reactions to medication
Drug allergies
Drug-induced hypertension
Getting a prescription filled
Home pharmacy
Inhaler medication administration several times over the years, only to crash and burnAirway burn
Burn, blister - close-up
Burn, thermal - close-up
Burns
Burns - resources
Eye burning - itching and discharge
First degree burn
Gastroesophageal reflux disease
Heartburn
Heartburn prevention
Minor burn - first aid - series. Stopping your medicationAllergic reactions to medication
Drug allergies
Drug-induced hypertension
Getting a prescription filled
Home pharmacy
Inhaler medication administration without consulting your Dr. can be dangerous for obvious reasons, but you also run the risk of developing a resistance to the very thing that could save your life. PLEASE BE PATIENTKidney diet - dialysis patients!! Some meds can take up to six weeks before you feel the full effects, everyone is different and what may work for one person may not work for another. Just like a pair of pants, you keep looking and trying on different pairs till you find that perfect fit. You WILL find that perfect fit, as long as you keep looking.
During a really rough time in my life, I convinced myself that the best thing I could do for my son was to kill myself. Having experienced my first loves suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior, I opted to go see my doctor instead. My doc asked me why I thought my permanent absence would be good for my son. I told her I didnt want the depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children to rub off on him. Then she asked me" But then what if he does end up with it? Who will be there for him? Who would understand more than you?
You said your depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children comes from your parents abandoning you. What is suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior if not the harshest form of abandonment?
Hang in there my friend, keep looking for that miracle, its out there.

Who will be there for your childrenChild neglect and psychological abuse
Child safety seats
School age child development?

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I know what you're saying. I was given up for adoption when I was two; abused by my adopted father and brother; have a biological familyBirth control and family planning
Choosing a primary care provider
Ewing’s sarcoma
Family troubles - resources history of depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children, have tried to commit suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior 3x in my life (tho not recently). I committed myself to inpatient hospital at one attempt; it helped a little.
The painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources of depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children is real like a brokenBroken bone
Broken or knocked out tooth limb. The general population may not understand that but I assure you people here do. You have to fight, for a new counselor and different meds. It is not unusual to try several types of anti-depressants before finding the right one for YOU.
Everyone's chemistry is different, as are the life challenges and experiences. All are valid. Your Life is valid, and your childrenChild neglect and psychological abuse
Child safety seats
School age child development love you, even through your fog. Just focus on getting through one more day; one hour at a time if need be. You are valuable and people love you. They do. DepressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children is angerIslets of langerhans
Ovarian cancer dangers
Pancreatic islet cell tumor turned inward. Turn it outward and fight your insurance, or whomever to get the right treatment. You deserve to feel normal again...

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I have had major major depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children for probably 25 years. I have taken everything: prozac, zoloft, trazadone, wellbutrin, i cant even remember all the different combos i have taken. you name it i've tried it. i finally TOLD my DR that i need aderrall. it has lifted the black cloud that held me backBack pain - low
Back strain treatment from socializing for those 25 years. Ask and ye shall receive. Those Psychiatrists see 20-30 patientsKidney diet - dialysis patients a day. You need to know what will work for you. I found this med and my life is completely different. It's not perfect. you may become addicted but i would rather have 10 years like this than 40 of what i had. Different topic but what dose do those who take Aderrall take?

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by the way i made 2 suicideSuicide and suicidal behavior attempts under the treatment of a psychiatrist prior to aderrall. aderrall doesn't completely cure that impulse because you do crash. (need xanax to take that edge off) but you know the next day you have more meds. sounds like an addict. call me what you want but i have never had more motivation or hope than i do now. im just going one day at a time in a different sense

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theres probably nothing i can say to help you. what i can say it that when i have shared my suicidal thoughts to others their unanimous response is "that is so selfish". I am single, no kids, but i do have neices and nephews and have been told that they worship me. So no matter how bad i feel about myself there are some people who would miss me. Believe me i was on the verge last night but i don't want to traumatize a 11 year old neice, 8 year old nephew as well as my 76 year old father. So you HAVE to think about them too. I have about 90mg of xanax plus 600mg if seroquel that could end it right now. I could be gone by the time this posts and i wouldn't miss this traumaAcoustic trauma
Amputation - traumatic
Ear barotrauma
Facial trauma
Genital injury
Head injury
Head trauma
Post-traumatic stress disorder
Stomach disease or trauma
Tailbone trauma called life. I pray that some day something good will happen to me. Its very hard livingAdvanced care directives in a familyBirth control and family planning
Choosing a primary care provider
Ewing’s sarcoma
Family troubles - resources where out of 6 kids you are the least successfull. Doctors, Lawyers, Investment Bankers. People that have more money than i will ever see. Alot of pressurePressure ulcer. And when you're known as the drugChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension addict, mentalMental retardation
Mental status tests institution patientKidney diet - dialysis patients, **** up, the spotlight is on you even more. SuicideSuicide and suicidal behavior is a constant thought for me. Aderrall has really helped me for the last 6 months but how long can this addictionDrug abuse and dependence go on.